What’s Going on with Kids Programmes?!

so the first three posts on this blog have been written by my other half S. apparently, i have got to have a go now. but what to write about? what major parenting issue should i wax lyrical about? co-sleeping? breast-feeding? baby-led weaning? actually no, i will blog about an issue so controversial that i may have to have another sip of my tea before continuing…….

what the hell has happened to kids programmes?!?!?!
back in the day, when I were a lad, in the mid 80’s we enjoyed a golden age of kids television. 
thomas the tank engine was an animated model railway, accompanied by the rolling and soothing narration by the drummer from the beatles. ringo was indeed a starr. postman pat went about his business in greendale with never an issue and jess had a minor passing role. fireman sam was down in pontypanty putting out fires and saving cats. 
good times were had by all. fast forward 25 or so years. 
what in gods name has happened?!
thomas the tank engine is no more. thomas and friends is an animated nonsense where the trains talk and the narrator is a ringo starr impersonator. robbed, i refer to netflix who thankfully have all the originals so i can show my son how good the old days were. sanity restored. 
fireman sam has gone down the same animated nonsense. gone are the days of stop motion puppetry or live action puppetry. gone are the days of quiet action down in pontypandy. now we have fireman sam extreme with the rocked up theme tune and whoa! someone needs saved contrived nonsense. 
and then we get to my biggest issue of them all. postman sodding pat. back in the day, pat had a van, a cat and a distinct air of permanent batchelorhood about him. nowadays he’s got a van, a helicopter, a truck, a motorbike a family and an attitude. no wonder the royal mail is on it’s arse-end with all those various modes of mail logistics to serve two villages. don’t even get me started on why there’s a sodding railway between the two either!!!
but i haven’t even got to my biggest complaint with postman pat yet. and it’s not even the rocking up of the shite theme tune for special delivery service. it’s this; why can’t pat deliver mail anymore?!?! to make the point may i offer some alternative lyrics to the aforementioned terrible theme tune:
“special delivery service, pats on his way. special delivery service. sds! what will the useless bastard lose today?”
honestly i truly believe our kids will be damaged irreparably by this irresponsible generalisation that pat will misplace, drop, break or allow to escape every single parcel he attempts delivery of. our kids will grow to believe that postmen (and women) are pathologically useless. they may well end up believing that setting the dog on them may well be justified in order to drive some sort of message home to sort themselves and their lives out. disgraceful. don’t even get me started on his whiney kid. what sort of name is julian anyway?!
so to conclude. kids tv was better in the 1980’s. also known as the good old days.
In other news; i have finally turned into my dad. 
A x
ps. we want to know what programmes you enjoyed as a kid, if modern day television has ruined them or what your children enjoy that really grinds your gears… please leave us a comment below.

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